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Author Topic: "...to a gunfight..."  (Read 2759 times)

George Potter

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"...to a gunfight..."
« on: June 26, 2005, 05:34:02 pm »

"....to a gunfight...."

by

George Potter

August 5, 2002




FADE IN

EXT. A TRAIN STATION - DAY

ANGLE ON

AN AVERAGE LOOKING MAN, wearing a suit, ascending a set of concrete stairs to an elevated train station.

CAMERA PANS as he steps across the busy area, and looks down the tracks. He sees that a train is just up the tracks, preparing to arrive. He looks satisfied, glances at his watch, then simply waits for the train.

HOLD

until the train arrives, screeching to a stop. THE MAN seems to enjoy the rush and roar. As soon as the train has stopped and opens it doors, he heads into the nearest set.

CUT TO

INT: THE TRAIN CAR - DAY

THE MAN makes his way through the nearly empty car until he finds a seat he likes. He sits....

CUT TO

MED. CLOSE on the MAN's midtorso, the image SMASH CUT repeats four times. Each contains a single discrepancy. The first sitting is clean, the second shows a peace symbol pin on a lapel, the third a quick draw holstered knife on the waistband, the fourth a 9mm in a shoulder holster.

POV THE MAN

sitting across from him is a rather rumpled OLD MAN, who emerges from a nap long enough to nod greetings to his co-passenger.

POV THE OLD MAN

THE MAN nods back, amiably enough.

ANOTHER ANGLE.

and the train begins to move, shuddering somewhat as it gains speed.

ANGLE ON

THE MAN, who seems to be daydreaming. The train suddenly goes underground, and the car becomes dark. It emerges again suddenly, into bright light.

TWO THUGS now stand before the man.

POV THE MAN as he looks up at his two new acquaintances. Complete thug types. The closest one grins, and produces a .25 caliber pistol. He makes a come-along gesture with his little gun and his friend grins.

MEDIUM SHOT

from the trains aisle. The THUGS face off against THE MAN.

SMASH CUTS into SPLIT SCREEN as four different reactions occur. The action FREEZES in its separate SCREEN as soon as the next is portrayed, ending in a FROZEN mosaic of four SCREENS.

THE MAN hands the thugs his wallet.

THE MAN begins to pray.

THE MAN pulls the knife from its case - it's a high quality, 5 inch switch - and lunges at the THUGS

THE MAN, with efficient skill, pulls the 9mm and levels it squarely at .25 CALIBER's head.

END SS/CUT TO

THE MAN handing over his wallet. THE THUGS take it, then demand his watch. He complies, looking pissed and helpless. The THUGS laugh and saunter off, shaking their heads.

CLOSE

on the man's sweaty, angry, and humiliated face, as the train enters the BLACK of the underground lines.

CUT TO

The man, beginning to pray. The THUGS laugh, then grow annoyed. .25 CALIBER thumps the man a good one. The other THUG ransacks the guy, who prays through it all. .25 CALIBER thumps him again, with the gun, and draws blood. The THUGS laugh and saunter off, shaking their heads.

CLOSE

On THE MAN'S intense, bloodied and oblivious face, his lips are still whispering in prayer as the train enters the BLACK of the underground lines.

CUT TO

THE MAN lunging with the knife, 5 gleaming inches springing into the air. .25 CALIBER manages to catch his knife hand, but drops the gun. THE MAN and .25 CALIBER wrestle on the opposite seats, as THE OLD MAN and the other THUG make tracks in opposite directions.

THE MAN and .25 CALIBER wrestle for a few moments, desperate movements. Suddenly, a shot rings out. THE MAN jerks, then rolls off of .25 CALIBER
and into the aisle. Blood seeps from a wound just below his solar plexus. 25. CALIBER stand shakily up, obviously freaked. He almost runs off, then remembers the whole point and helps himself to THE MAN'S wallet and watch. Then he beats a quick retreat.

CLOSE

On THE MAN's shocked, agonized and dying face as the train enters the BLACK of the underground lines.

CUT TO

THE MAN, giving .25 CALIBER a lesson in superiority of firepower. .25 CALIBER looks ready to piss himself. The little gun falls from his hand as he and his partner exit the area posthaste.

CLOSE/SLOW MOTION

On the .25 CALIBER, as it hits the aisle floor and tumbles to a stop.

POV THE MAN

THE OLD MAN is fully alert now, with what seems like an overtly hefty .357 revolver, tracking the THUGS as they flee. After a moment, he uncocks the hammer and holsters his gun. He meets his co-passengers eyes. He nods again.

POV THE OLD MAN

THE MAN reholsters and nods back with a smile that says. "Thanks for the backup."

ANOTHER ANGLE

as the man looks at the .25, then pulls out his handkerchief. He picks the gun up and takes a closer look. He grimaces. He gestures with it to THE OLD MAN, who eyes it - then makes the same grimace and shakes his head.

THE MAN shrugs, and idly tosses it into a nearby trash can.

THE OLD MAN nods - finding that a fitting place for a tool of that shameful quality - yawns, then kicks back to resume his nap.

CLOSE

on THE MAN's calm face, settling back into his interrupted daydream, as the train enters the BLACK of the underground lines.

FADE OUT

 
Logged

Jac

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"...to a gunfight..."
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2005, 05:45:44 pm »

WHOA!

That blew me away, man. Perfect imagery. B)  
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I have never regretted that I chose to "take the red pill." But there are days, just rarely, when the truth is so ugly, so brutal, so unmerciful, so relentless, that even if I wouldn't rip the truth from the wall socket and hurl it out the window to crash on the sidewalk below, I wouldn't mind if it featured a snooze button so we could savor just a few more moments in slumbered pretension and warm, fuzzy lies pulled snugly up over our heads.
--PSM

Joel

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"...to a gunfight..."
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2005, 06:39:17 pm »

:)  Maybe in Greater LaPorte they'd film that.

 :angry: Ain't gonna happen around here.  
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Yet another Freedomista blog: The Ultimate Answer to Kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Bill St. Clair

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"...to a gunfight..."
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2005, 07:04:38 pm »

It'd be great to see that in "The Twenty" before a film, advertising handguns or handgun classes. I won't hold my breath.
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"The state can only survive as long as a majority is programmed to believe that theft isn't wrong if it's called taxation or asset forfeiture or eminent domain, that assault and kidnapping isn't wrong if it's called arrest, that mass murder isn't wrong if it's called war." -- Bill St. Clair

"Separation of Earth and state!" -- Bill St. Clair

Ian

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"...to a gunfight..."
« Reply #4 on: June 26, 2005, 07:31:14 pm »

I love it. Thought it was great  ever since I first saw it as ASC a couple years ago. :)
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And Tomlinson took up the tale and spoke of his good in life.
"O this I have read in a book," he said, "and that was told to me,
"And this I have thought that another man thought of a Prince in Muscovy."
The good souls flocked like homing doves and bade him clear the path,
And Peter twirled the jangling Keys in weariness and wrath.
"Ye have read, ye have heard, ye have thought," he said, "and the tale is yet to run:
"By the worth of the body that once ye had, give answer—what ha' ye done?"
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